Menjadi Perempuan Tangguh Abad 21

Susahnya jadi perempuan zaman sekarang! Maafkan jika saya harus memulai postingan kali ini dengan sedikit mengeluh. Tetapi memang betul kok, susah jadi perempuan di zaman yang penuh tuntutan macam sekarang ini.

Lulus dengan gilang gumilang dari top five prominent universities lalu bekerja di perusahaan terkemuka di Indonesia tidak menjamin lolos dari cibiran maut. Bahkan dalam lingkungan terdekat keluarga pun juga, cih! They don’t care how much money you’ve earn or successful carrier you’ve reached. No they don’t care how many countries you’ve visited or how many language you’ve able to speak. No baby, it won’t count as long as you can’t cook and perform as a good wife. Bah!

Dimulai dari tuntutan pekerjaan yang menggila dan tuntutan masyarakat yang terkadang mulai tidak bisa dinalar lagi. Langsung punya anak setelah menikah dituduh hamil duluan, engga punya anak juga digunjikan. Oh my my my!

Lalu bagaimana? Haruskah menangis lalu menyerah begitu saja? Hell no! Jadi perempuan zaman sekarang harus tangguh dengan mental dan hati sekeras baja! Don’t let them beat you down. No, don’t give them that chance.

Tegakkan kepala dan biarkan saja. Let your success talk. Note ini sekaligus menjadi refleksi untuk saya, yang sejenak merasa teraniaya. Tetapi demi Nona Cantik yang saat ini masih berada di dalam perut, saya harus bisa menjadi contoh yang baik. Menjadi perempuan tangguh, agar anak saya pun tangguh. Wish us luck!

The First Note

Dear Munchkin,

It’s now November 23, 2014 and you’re just almost three months old in my tummy. Currently on this exact date and time, I was alone in my dorm. Your father is still on his duty, as foreman in one of the most respected oil company. He got one month on duty, and one month holiday. But in this cold November, your father is still away.

Today was our four months anniversary. Yes my dear, your father and I married on August 23, 2014 – the same exact date with your grannie and nennie. When we’re organizing our wedding, your father and I agreed that we want a baby right away. We’ve been dating for eight years, and marriage is another amazing adventure that we’ll do together. So, your father has secured a beautiful house in Yogyakarta so that we’ve could move in together after we got married and start our little family.

Things got slightly complicated when my application to one of the most respected coal mining company got accepted. We never plan to move to Jakarta, but for the good cause – so called a better future, we’ve to Jakarta. So here we are kids, owning a small pavilioun that cost a fortune in the heart of Jakarta.

We’ve cancelled our beautiful little home in Yogyakarta, pack our thingies and start a life in Jakarta. But to life in Jakarta isn’t as simple and humble as in Yogyakarta. Everything come in fierce and struggle. I just started my career in a competely different path than my old career. You see, moving from tourism industry (fun, dynamic, colorful) into coal mining industry (cold, fierce, and serious) is really different. I even got full migraine on my first two weeks. But Munchkin, quit is never in my mind.

So I did anything that I could do to make it better. To struggle and prove that they’ve choose the right person for this job. It ain’t easy, as I have to learn something new everyday, pushed me from my comfort zone. At first I was afraid that I might hurt you in someway as I was really busy. I got no time to take a rest, hell my days was full of running rampant. The worse maybe what they called morning sickness, but to me it was felt like everytime sickness because I tend to puke anytime. I have no apetite to eat, and it seems that all the energies flies to the moon – left me uncharged and weak.

With your father away on his duty, doesn’t made my life easier. I have to struggle alone by myself in this fierce city. But Munchkin, you should remember this – we gotta be tough. Life is no easy. I used to do everything by myself since the day your grand daddy past away. So I hope, you’ll be a stronger person, tough and fierce.

We watch tremendous growth of you, and I feel that you’re growing inside of me. I can feel those tiny but strong heartbeat in my tummy. And those tiny heartbeat has strengthen me.

And your father – though he’s not a romantic type person (seriously, I’ve dated that man for 8 years, and he never did anything romantic during that 8 years) – but you managed to turn him into a romantic father. He said that he miss you much through various phone calls. Always check me whether I’ve taken any vitamin or food for you. And he got really furious when I didn’t eat. Last night he mentioned during our phone call that he wants to see you soon as possible as he misses you so much. Your old man is a very cold man darling, but you’ve turn him into a romantic man. And I love it.

On our early wedding, your father and I still struggle to make a better future for you, my dear Munckin. We love you so much and we couldn’t wait to see you. Doctor said that your due date is on June 2015. We’re sure that its gonna be an awesome year, as I believe that 2014 was also amazing as it’s the year that I got married to your old man, and got you.

These are one of the first note that I’m writing to you, to show you how much we love you. As days goes by, and your getting older – these are remininse of our love to you my dear Munckin. May you always be happy, stronger, and briliant.

November 23, 2014

Love Mommy

Over the Promenade

Hi! It’s me again! Today I wrote this post in my new place in Jakarta, yes I have moved in to Jakarta. This is me and my whole new life. I’m just recently got married and got a new job – the dynamic changes that astonished me, even now I still feel like living in a dream. Is this really happening?

I found the man that I’m in love for almost 8 years slept next to me in the morning, I rolled my eyes and tried to wake up – I’m not dreaming! He was there sleeping sound with a smile on his face. I rolled over; I was on his comfy and warm arms, kissed his cheeks and lips: tender and real. Um, wait, why do I have to write these disturbing details? Well, my husband is now on site already, he is now working for another 4 weeks – hence the weird details. Hahahah!

It didn’t affect me so much when we were still dating, but now I cried my eyes out when he was away for work. I cried at day one, and felt so lonely. Maybe because I was new at this city, I barely know anyone and my husband is my only one who I can talk to. And now when he is away – I felt so lonely. Did I mention too much lonely word? Yes, indeed I am lonely.

But still I am blessed with everything that I got now. I got loving man, a family man and a steady job. I can’t ask for more. After long struggle to get this job, I finally got that phone call that I always dreamt for. It was on a beautiful Friday, I got that offering call and I was so head over heels. Finally, all my efforts paid off! FYI, I was trying to get this job from the beginning of this year. It’s indeed a prestigious company with super cool position and I can’t believe that I got this.

The saddest part was saying goodbye to my beloved friends and Jogjakarta. They are my family in Jogjakarta, more than friends, and really best friends in happiness and sadness. But I have to move forward and here I am. Tomorrow will be awesome, but I know that I have to struggle more in this city. Wish me luck!

Super Bomb August

Hi! It’s been a decade since my last post here. I was just too swamped and too lazy to update this blog. I got too many things to handle – not enough time and full of tension. Call me crazy, but I think I turned into one of the bridezilla! It is indeed pre wedding is one of the crucial period, it got full of tension and super long list of wedding check list. Not to mention my hundreds of workloads and pre wedding wars. And my fiancée is still away as he is still on duty. Oh just shoot me already!

August is such a special month for me. There LOTS going on in August, let me tell you why:

• August 23, 1987. My Mom and Daddy happily married on this date. She said that it was one of the best moments of her life. I agree. During their marriage, My Mom and Daddy are so happy. I never saw them fighting, such a perfect role model for me. Yes, we have lots of problem – but I know my parents handled their conflict so perfectly. How knew that 27 years later I am going to get married on this date too? I know that I wrote “August 21, 2014” as my wedding date on the previous post, but suddenly my family decided to change it to August 23, 2014 and I couldn’t be more happier as it was the date of My Mom and Dad marriage, and it is also on the weekend so my best friends will be able to attend it. I hope my marriage will be as happy as my Mom and Daddy.
• August 5, 2009. My Daddy passed away due to sudden heart attack. That was the worst day in my life. The most painful too, it was too painful I cried my eyes out. During his funeral, I can’t even cry. Ever since that, I never cried in any funeral, not even when my Grand Ma passed away on August 9, 2012.
• August 5, 2012. Our beloved Grand Ma passed away. She passed away with a smile on her pretty face in her sleep. She was another role model for me too. A tough and loving wife, mom and Grand Ma.

This August is super amazing for me. I cried my eyes out on several night, got panic attack and severe anxiety, and laugh out loud too. I think August this year will be a turning point for me as I will – obviously – enter the new phase of my life as a wife of my lovely husband, but also a new career too. Finally, after long of struggle a glimpse of happiness came to me. I’ll tell you later when it’s official as I don’t wanna jinx it. Cheers!

Hello Rainy Season!

Ah now its official rainy season in Jogjakarta, and I really love it because the weather gets cold and its really comfortable wearing pajamas while sipping hot chocolate. Those are the me-time routine and I’m doing it quite often lately as I think I owe myself bunch of quality me-time for myself for working so hard lately. The downside of rainy season is the cold and melancholic side of it. With long distance relationship and sad songs, I’m getting melancholic now. Ah, how I miss those strong arm to hold and the warm hands. I really wish to get another job in Jakarta that enable me to see my fiancee soon to be husband. I know its sound silly to gamble my career just to see my fiancee everyday, but honestly I’m getting tired of being a single fighter.

The needing of life companion is getting stronger for me lately. I never thought that I’m going through this pace already, but now I hate to come home and find nobody but me in my empty room. Sound so melancholic? Yes, indeed I am. I hate to do everything just by myself: eating, watching movies, sleeping and waking up alone. I think I had enough and can’t wait for another pace of my life. Hopefully it will be soon enough. Wish me luck! Cheerio!

Addiction of Flying

Garuda Indonesia in Ngurah Rai Airport: Photo by Fitri H Pramudita

 

Hi there,

Greetings from sunny Jogjakarta, it’s really damn hot with 38 degree Celsius here and I wonder when the rainy season will eventually come to chill down. Ah speaking of rain, I suddenly get mellow melancholic—again. It’s been a very tough weeks for me with tons of assignments, but honestly I really like it. My job is getting so much interesting lately with the necessity to fly around to several magnificent places. Last week I had to fly to Bali and Lombok, and even if was just three days flying and running rampant—I’d say it was just great! Finally I’m returned to Bali and Lombok after years! Yay!

I was in Bali for serious meetings—and I mean really serious as we’re arranging a new flight route between Bali and Denpasar to boost more visitors especially from China. We have been witnessed positive trends from China outbound to Indonesia and now China visitors are in the second rank outranking Japan who is now at the third place. As China outbound growing positively, we are pitching more Chinese traveler to Indonesia, so we are now gearing up in conducting more cooperation with travel industry in attracting more visitors to Indonesia.

As my Boss had to fly to Lombok for another meeting, I had to replace him in ultra-serious meeting with expert of travel industries in Bali. I was so scared, as I’m just a junior staff with no more than three years experience and dealing with top gun in travel industries. I feel like the kid at the adult table. But my Boss had brief me and told me that I had to be able to take the big step if I want to develop myself. So with extra nervous at the beginning, I slowly regain my confidence and win the meeting. Yay!

I always fascinated with airplane and flying around, indeed I am. Even now I had been in tons of flight experiences, I always enjoy every minutes of it. Starting when the airplane taking off to the horizon, even it bumping around of the turbulence, and landed to the ground—I did enjoy every minutes of it. For me traveling is not just about where we are going, but how we enjoy the process itself. So yeah, I’m gonna enjoy every minutes of it. Ciao!

 

Wings Air landed in Lombok Praya International Airport. Photo by Fitri H Pramudita

If You Love Me, Won’t You Let Me Know?

 

“Violet Hill”

 

Was a long and dark December
From the rooftops I remember
There was snow
White snow

Clearly I remember
From the windows they were watching
While we froze down below

When the future’s architectured
By a carnival of idiots on show
You’d better lie low

If you love me
Won’t you let me know?

Was a long and dark December
When the banks became cathedrals
And the fog became God

Priests clutched onto bibles
Hollowed out to fit their rifles
And the cross was held aloft

Bury me in honor
When I’m dead and hit the ground
A love back home it unfolds

If you love me
Won’t you let me know?

I don’t want to be a soldier
Who the captain of some sinking ship
Would stow, far below

So if you love me
Why’d you let me go?

I took my love down to violet hill
There we sat in snow
All that time she was silent still

So if you love me
Won’t you let me know?

If you love me,
Won’t you let me know?

-Coldplay-

Put A Ring on It!

Hey, I just bought myself a beautiful big-rock-ring (my colleagues said that its too sparkling for daily use)–but I don’t care. I basically like the biggest rock, and even better it create radiance spark so I really like it. Honestly there is a sad story behind it.

Long time ago, I’ve asked my boyfriend to propose me with a big rock wedding engagement but he never did that. He’s obviously not a romantic boyfriend, and in fact he’s obviously a straight forward person so when he come up with wedding plan he just said ‘lets have a wedding in bla bla bla, my plan is actually bla bla bla bla and no wedding engagement,  no romantic cliche with dinner and flowers, no such thing like that. It was all business and done we’ve signed the contract and agreed to get married. 

I know that my boyfriend loves me, even he didn’t give me the romantic dreams that I always dream about. In his opinion, being romantic is being able to stand by me, no matter what happened, and he prove that. Even with fucking 512 km distance between us, I can always reach him whenever I want it.

So it wasn’t shock me, if up to this day, he never get me the beautiful ring that I always dream about. Sad huh? Yep.

Then last night I took a picture of my new ring, and sent it to him–just want to show that I am actually able to buy myself a fancy ring–that he won’t buy. So my boyfriend called and said “baby, I just want to save the big ring for the big day, you know it has to mean something, like you baby”. Oh wow, that was really mind blowing and he win again, and I didn’t get the ring again! DAMN! But hey, he said that he’ll get me at my wedding day, so no need to worry, huh?  Cheers!

Kerlap Kerlip 2012

Ah sudah Desember, dan dalam hitungan hari tahun 2013 akan datang. Beberapa minggu lalu saya sangat berharap untuk dapat skip November dan Desember langsung menuju Januari 2013 karena bagi kami yang bekerja untukpemerintah, bulan November dan Desember itu seperti neraka. Semua proyek dan kegiatan sudah harus diselesaikan sebelum akhir kontrak, dan itu harus dilaksanakan dengan bermalam-malam lembur, merelakan setiap akhir pekan di kantor, memusatkan waktu di kantor, bulan November dan Oktober saya bahkan masuk penuh tanpa libur sabtu-minggu sekali pun. Tapi semua kerja keras ini berbuah manis pada akhirnya, yah seperti lagu Coldplay “Good things are coming our way di Up With the Birds”.

Tahun 2012 mengajarkan banyak hal bagi saya, di tahun ini saya mulai berani untuk berkata TIDAK kepada orang. Dulu saya sangat takut untuk berkata tidak, dan terpaksa melalukan apa saja untuk menyenangkan hati orang, terutama atasan. Tetapi akhirnya saya mulai berani berkata tidak dan mempertahankan argument saya, dan tidak terlindas begitu saja. Tahun 2012 saya jadi lebih mendalami dunia kerja, mulai mengerti politik benar dalam dunia kerja. Beberapa rekan saya memulai karier mereka dengan cara kotor, menyenangkan hati atasan dengan cara apapun—tapi itu sah-sah saja karena pada dasarnya politik memang digunakan untuk mencapai tujuan. Saya mencapainya dengan kerja keras—karena saya tidak terlahir dengan posisi status keluarga penting ataupun uang yang banyak untuk menyenangkan hati atasan. Tahun 2012 ini mengajarkan saya bahwa dengan kerja keras, bicara secukupnya dan mengedapankan hasil ternyata berbuah manis: dapat mengunjungi tempat-tempat yang bahkan tidak saya duga akan dapat dikunjungi: Guangzhou, Beijing dan Tokyo.

Sayangnya dengan terlalu sibuk di kantor pada tahun ini saya melewatkan banyak kesempatan beasiswa dan bahkan tidak punya waktu banyak untuk membuat application letter yang outstanding sehingga hasilnya tetap nihil. Padahal resolusi tahun 2012 saya adalah mendapatkan beasiswa ke luar negeri untuk belajar tourism management. Satu-satunya resolusi tahun 2012 yang tercapai hanyalah mendapatkan GFF Silver dengan mileage diatas 15,000. Simpel sih sebenarnya, tetapi bagi saya ini adalah pencapaian yang berarti—diilhami oleh film Up In The Air yang diperankan George Clooney—semenjak itu saya pengen punya mileage yang banyak. Semoga pada tahun 2012 nanti saya bisa mendapatkan mileage diatas 20,000 jadi bisa kayak George Clooney di Up in The Air yang punya mileage 1,000,000 gitu.

Aniwei, semoga 2012 ini benar-benar bisa ditutup dengan manis dan berharap terbaik untuk tahun 2013 mendatang.

 

visit to Sekolah Republik Indonesia Tokyo

 

me and the magnificent Tokyo Tower

 

 

harus menutup muka dan telinga karena suhu -10 derajad Celcius tapi Great Wall memang benar-benar “Great”

Heart Beats

Tomorrow I will leave for Tokyo and for the first time I get six hours flight—that’s going to be my longest flight in my history. This record will break my four hours flight from Jakarta to Guangzhou. I’m so nervous since this is a business trip—the very serious one because I have to deal with the top gun in Japan, arrange from A to Z, plus I never been to Japan before. But I’m so excited! Hahahahahah can’t hide my excitement because honestly, I really want to go to Japan. This remarkable country is one of my go places before I die.

Its 21.00 and I’m still at the office to prepare tons of things before going to Japan. Wish me luck people, I’m so nervous but excited at the same time!